Okay this is SOLID 24K GOLD.
I am SUPER TURNED OFF.
I dont even know what to name this entry. WTF is the most apt.
Last week I met an old (sort of) friend for lunch. (Knew him since 2006 or 2007.)
I havent seen him since early 2010 and he got married about a year ago. The last time we met was over dinner at Sushi Tei in Holland V. He had just ended a relationship then and I remember him telling me that his ex girlfriend had cheated on him and that he was not ready for a relationship. Very soon after he started dating this girl, and things were pretty serious. After a few years, they tied the knot.
So as a friend, obviously I was happy for him.
He would occasionally comment on my Facebook posts but other than that, we did not have much interaction over the last three years.
After lunch, he went back to work and I went about running my errands. He sent me some Whatsapp messages which were inappropriate, to say the least.
“Well, if it makes you feel any better I feel damn wasted I never got a chance to sleep with you.”
I sent him three smirky faced emoticons because I did not know what to say.
And then he sent me THIS:
“having said that, Im curious. would you consider sleeping with me? and you know that im being completely upfront about everything cos Im not making any false promises or telling you any lies. I find you very attractive so Im curious how it would be like if we fucked… haha :D”
Yes, word for word. Down to the letter.
I was speechless.
It was shock, followed by disbelief. And then I got REALLY PISSED.
This is so wrong on so many levels. So where should I even begin?
1. He is married.
2. He CHOSE to date someone else, married her and THEN come looking for me, thinking Id somehow be receptive to his sexual advances.
3. He chose to ask me if he can fuck me, via Whatsapp. Much smooth. So wow. Such amaze.
4. He was fairly confident that I would be open to it, because otherwise he wouldnt have asked so blatantly. Which leads me to think that he must have thought that….
a. I am THAT easy.
b. I can overlook the fact that he is married.
c. I would happily have sex with him knowing that he ONLY wants sex. Nothing more, nothing less.
d. I have no expectations whatsoever and I dont expect to be treated with respect. You wanna do me? Sure….. Of course. Why not?
Sure. Lets fuck, so that YOU can satisfy YOUR fucking curiosity.
Erm…. if I have to sleep with every guy who finds me “very attractive” and is “curious” to find out how it would be like to fuck me, I would be a very very very very busy woman.
I have not felt this insulted in a very long time. If a man had any decency at all, he wouldnt ask a woman if she is willing to fuck him, OVER FUCKING WHATSAPP. What, were you raised in jail?? This is unacceptable. Especially coming from a man who had been privileged enough to receive higher education. I guess they dont teach manners or class in law school.
And most ridiculous of all.. he somehow thought that being “completely upfront”, “not making any false promises” and “not telling me lies” are good enough reasons for me to WANT to do him.
This is the same kind of ass attitude some men have, thinking that women should WANT to date them simply because they’re “not assholes”. Cmon, name me a whole list of shit things you’re NOT. Because that is so attractive.
I want to know how a man can be so fucking deluded to think that a woman would happily sleep with him, fully aware that she is nothing more than just a warm vagina to him. I am not a prude but this is beyond fucking ridiculous.
I think I know why I was “targeted” by him . I live alone and can host. Therefore saving him the trouble of having to source for… location. That must be why I am sooo damn “attractive”. Attractive enough to wanna bang on a semi-regular basis in MY HOME, but somehow not attractive enough to date or take seriously as a potential long term partner.
(He had dinner with me, then went on to date someone else. I was friend-zoned. Not that I was interested in him, because I wasnt. But fact remains that he did not choose to date me.)
In every and any kind of relationship, both parties need to bring something to the table. Its like a business partnership. If one party has nothing to offer, eventually the relationship will wilt. In a romantic relationship, things dont always have to be equal but it does need to be reciprocal.
Nobody likes to be taken advantaged of, or be taken as a sucker or a fool.
So. What are you bringing to my table, Mr Wishful Thinking?
Please take your hot piece of dick and ass, go home to your wife and do her. Because I sure aint doing you. I dont know what kind of shit “arrangement” you have with her, which apparently allows you some “leeway” to do other chicks whilst being married, but I dont want to know. And I dont know why you chose to marry her if she’s the kind of girl who’ll fuck around behind your back.
I do need you to know that I am many things, but definitely not stupid. Nor promiscuous, for that matter.
Ive met countless douchebags over the years. This isnt the first time, probably wont be the last. Maybe its my
slutty party girl face. Who knows? Turns out the easiest girls are usually the ones who actually look & dress like prudes. #irony
So please allow me to be very clear on one thing:
I only date gentlemen who know how to treat ladies with kindness and respect. This is the bare minimum and I expect nothing less from men. Even then, it does not mean I will invite him into my home, much less my bed.
This is like…… someone trying to enter the First Class lounge without a fucking boarding pass. AND THEN want to breeze through immigration via the express lane. You cant help but snort at the sheer audacity of it all. Wtf. What was he thinking?
P.S: This is all the fucking you’re gonna get from me. You’re welcome.